It's so interesting, because as a person who grew up in abject poverty, having my own apartment, even in a shitty neighborhood felt like an accomplishment. I spent a lot of years as a workaholic to try to prove that I was worthy because I made enough money and had all the things. More recently, my husband and I sold everything and moved to Mexico with only six suitcases, but we are very happy. If you can stop feeling resentment about how your life didn't work out, perhaps you can find a solution that is more supportive for you and your children.