Life isn’t happening to you, it’s happening for you…

Bevin Niemann-Cortez
4 min readMay 17, 2021


I hear the drone of water processing through the Keurig, as I complete my morning tea-making ritual. Ripppppp as I tear open the tea package. Each one has a little tag imprinted with a unique slice of wisdom, kind of like an early morning fortune cookie.

Yesterday’s message? ‘Life isn’t happening to you; it’s happening for you.’

I catch myself rolling my eyes, yeh I’ve heard that one before. How accurate can a mass-manufactured, feel-good message really be, anyway?

Then I remind myself, everything in life is talking to me. Every song on the radio, every spirit animal that visits my front yard, one impactful thing a friend or family member shared, and yes, every tea bag message too, no matter how cliché it sounds.

I pause to contemplate deeply. Reflect on how much of my life was spent in the belief that life was happening to me. How that mindset cast me in the role of victim, unable and unwilling to take responsibility for my reality. I’m not self-flagellating, just speaking truth.

I often felt everything was out of control — pure chaos. I couldn’t control other people’s decisions, emotions or actions, hell most of the time I couldn’t even control my own. Life seemed to be just a series of random occurrences; I had no way to predict what would show up next.

Believing that life was happening to me, prompted questions like:

‘Am I being punished for something I did in a past life?’

‘Is this my karma, playing out?’

‘Why me? It’s not fair!’

It’s difficult to pinpoint the exact moment when I embraced that I am an active creator of my own reality. I’d read about this in a variety of spiritual books and listened to countless spiritual leaders repeat it.

But did I truly embody this belief? Sort of.

Sometimes, I achieved the ‘right’ vibration to attract what I desired. Occasionally, it showed up as expected, but most of the time, the form my vision took in the Earthly realm was a complete surprise.

However, I wasn’t consistent in being able to influence my reality. Perhaps there’s something I’m doing wrong…



Bevin Niemann-Cortez

Honored to have reached 100,000+ highly sensitive people across our planet with the message that you are not alone :)